Matter of Opinion

A blog about thoughts, fear, happiness, regret, ambition, anger and all the emotions you could think of.

Own up the size up

Few days back I bought a bigger shirt.

Since, the time I have gained back the few pounds I had lost, I refused to look at myself in the mirror. I have been putting it off for a while but I realised that you have to learn and accept who you are, or more importantly, who you have become. When you brush you hair in the morning you have to have a one on one with yourself. You can’t avoid. Even in that dim yellow light you do recognise yourself. I consider it a blessing that I have to get ready for the office in that dim light. The lesser I see of myself the better.

The bra-strap bites me. Every time it does, it reminds me that maybe it is because I am a couple of centimeter fatter today as compared to the day I bought the bra. Honestly, no one likes to be fat. Like no one wants to be short. As if it is some kind of flaw. It has taken me a lot to realise that these are only ways to describe us and no one is pointing out our flaws. If the entire world would have been fat, being thin would have been a flaw. It is not necessary for everyone to be tall and slender. Not everyone is supposed be same.

People who matter really see beyond your size. They see the person you are and not your appearance. In which case, it works as a mechanism that tells us who really care for us and who are not biased just because of the appearance. You be a good person, chances are you’ll always be a good person. But a thin person can become fat and vice versa. Every time I want to be thin, I tell myself that I am, in no way an obstacle, a disgrace or burden in anyway.  I am smart, multi-talented and independent woman. And  I want to do everything else right so that all that people have left to say about me in a negative light is that, ‘I am fat’.


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